Wannabe

I normally don't fill up my blog with book reviews, but I just read a really good one (book, that is, not blog). It's Catalyst by Laurie Halse Anderson. I couldn't stop reading it. Now I'm going to have to read all her books, and add them all to the library stack. (I complained once to an author about the huge waiting list at the library for Shannon Hale books--whom I also love--and she suggested I buy them and support my local authors. Right. At the rate I read, I'd have to get a home equity loan.) Sometimes, I come across a good book like that and I am so glad I read so much YA literature. And I'm also stinking jealous. I wish I could download her brain. I'd better go read some badly written book to make myself feel better.

Can't stop punning

I remember, way back when I first started writing the novel, my title was Candi Land. Any thoughts?

I hate it when he's right

My sweet husband told me last night that I need to change the title of Book 1 because it's cheesy. He could have mentioned that before I sent it out six times. My original title was Candied Yams and Canadian Ham. So it rhymes and it's a pun at the same time. You mean book people don't like cutesy?

I'm having a hard time thinking of another one. I'm open to suggestions! The best I've come up with so far is just a shortened version--Candied Yams. Of course, it sounds like a cookbook. But it's the best I've got so far.

I aim to please

Every agent has different requirements. It's actually funny sometimes. I've read books and blogs that insist it's a bad idea to send agents plot outlines for sequels, especially if they're for trilogies or series, because if your first book smells worse than my fridge, they won't want to see the rest. But then I read an SCBWI discussion board rumor that Laura Rennert with Andrea Brown books signed an author and got him a six-figure deal because she was so impressed with the plot outlines for the six books he wanted to write after the one he was pitching. Some agents want only email, some snail mail. Some are query only, but some want an outline or a synopsis (what are those? depends who you ask) and/or the first ten pages. Some respond by email, some want a SASE, and some don't reply at all. Some will accept simultaneous submissions, but most want you to send them exclusive submissions so only their intern has the right to throw it in the shredder while you sit at home picking your nose.

Firefighting Kyle

Never fear. You and your belongings are safe with Firefighter Kyle on the job.

Why I need help

Ha! I bet all 2 of my loyal readers had something to say about me after reading that title! Just kidding. I actually have 3 loyal readers.

Anyway, I was thinking about something I read a long time ago (I am so the less-effective writer who can't even give you a source) where some husband said something like this: "My wife doesn't come to my office, go to my meetings, do my paperwork, or help me out in my job in any way at all. That would just be silly. So why should anyone expect me to help with hers?"

Here goes. Sir.

If you're assuming that your wife's job as a SAHM is to do the dishes and the laundry, WRONG! Her job is to take care of the children. She probably didn't give up her career (or potential career) because sparkling windows were her life's ambition. It was because she couldn't resist those cute little dimpled faces. She may do more housework than you because she's home more or because you've agreed to that together, but that's extra. So you don't need to feel you're doing her job when you sweep the floor. Also, even if you understand that her job is child care, they are still your children, too.

How many hours a week does your job take? 40? 60? Her job is more like 100. Are you paying her overtime? Are the kids? Didn't think so. She puts in a lot more hours at her job than you. Not that we're keeping score (OK, we are), but sometimes she needs a break.

Also, she may not be proofreading your interdepartmental memos at the moment, but she probably has helped you with your job at some point. Like when she put you through school so you could get that job, or helped you study, or helped you prepare for the interview.

It's probably a good thing I don't know the source for that quotation. I don't think his inbox is big enough. But I'd be glad to share the responsibility of opening some emails with him.

April Bargain Brag

I have to write about this, 'cause I'm really good. Today I got two pairs of kids' sandals, two kids' swim suits, a men's dress shirt, and a pair of jeans and a sweater for me. The grand total was under $47. Unfortunately, I put it on the credit card, but we won't talk about that.

188 rejections

Last night, I listened to a presentation by Jessica Day George, a YA author. She brought her binder full of rejections as a prop and showed us some of them, like the one written in crayon and the one from the same publisher who ended up offering her a contract two weeks later. There were 188 of them. She said many authors told her to expect about 100 rejections before getting published. She hit 100 and kept right on going.

Some of her advice I'd already heard before (from the multiple writing books I read when I was procrastinating doing any actual writing), but some of it was quite valuable. I learned about polishing the three-minute verbal pitch and about meeting agents and editors face-to-face. Writer's conferences, baby! If I'm really going to do this writing thing, I might have to invest some actual dollars in writing association dues and conference fees. There is such a thing as legitimate business expenses. Sometimes, when you start a business, you have to pay for expenses before you get any income.

In the meantime, I'll keep sending queries. I've only got five rejections so far. I've got some work to do.

Do you love Canada?

If you lived in Canada before, live in Canada now, or have visited Canada before, I would like you to post to this blog right here to tell me what you love about Canada. I will start. I hope everyone will post lots of comments.

1. Tim Horton's

2. Roch Voisine

3. Caramilk

4. Shreddies

5. Sarah McLachlan

6. Metric system

7. Joy Kogawa

8. CBC and Radio-Canada

9. Museum of Civilization

10. Anne of Green Gables

Pay yourself first

"The world will in large measure pay you what it thinks you are worth, and your worth will increase as you gain education and proficiency in your chosen field." - Pres. Gordon B. Hinckley

I'm going to take this quotation totally out of context and write about what he didn't say. If the world pays me what it thinks I'm worth, then if it doesn't pay me, it thinks I'm worthless. How's that for depressing? Mamas who stay at home don't get nuttin' (unless you count child tax credits). Not only do they not get paid, they don't have access to ordinary job benefits like health insurance, Social Security, retirement, vacation time/pay, etc. Most mothers couldn't afford to take care of their kids if they didn't have a husband bringing home the bacon and the benefits. So as long as hubby is employed, employable, and sticks around, mama does OK. These days that's less of a certainty.

So mommies don't get any kind of help. And SAHMs like me knew that going into it, so we weren't shocked when the paychecks with our names on it stopped coming.

What's hard for me is that people equate no income with no job. It's not like I spend a lot of time socializing and answering ,"So what do you do?" questions. It's just that I feel like my job doesn't exist. Like when I'm filling out some questionnaire or survey and they ask me employment status and my choices are full-time, part-time, or unemployed. Or when they ask me what field I work in and my choices are arts, technology, business and health care (how about "all of the above?)"

I recognize that my financial contributions help our family in less obvious ways. For example, we got some pretty sweet offers on our condo after I cleaned it up and patched the walls. We'd be spending thousands more on child care and groceries but for my excellent child-rearing and bargain-hunting skills. That's essentially the same as making money because both saving it and earning it put money in our pockets. But somehow saving money doesn't get the glory.

Unless some politicians make some major changes, mamas are still going to be poor and anonymous for the next little while. And most of the world won't care. So apart from trying to change the world, the other responsibility of mamas is to find our own sense of self-worth. Because if we're counting on the world to tell us we matter (in the only currency it communicates with), we'll be waiting a long time.

Avoid them like the plague

You already know I can't stand excessive substitutes for the word "said". Here's something else that makes me want to pick up a book and beat myself black and blue. I see them so much in literature that I can't believe my eyes. They are so last year. Clichés. Recently, I saw so many of them in a book I was reading that I threw the book down in disgust. I see them in books that are very popular, and even by authors who are theoretically well respected. Sometimes, expressions such as these can be useful. You can even turn one on its head to make things interesting or funny. But most of the time, enough is enough.

Ring Around the Rosies

Rejected again

I feel like a missionary. But missionaries keep going. They don't take it personally and neither do I. Here's an inspirational quotation from a real live author:

"I still have all the rejection letters for my short stories laminated into a long roll I show during high school visits." Newbery Honor winner Shannon Hale (Deseret Morning News, July 8, 2007)